The nomination has passed me by

I work from home.  It is a would be ideal scenario for the working mother, single mom guilt.  Other days, it brings more stress than it might be worth.  Yesterday was high up on list of "those" days.  I transitioned from working full time at the office specifically so I could spend more time with my son and be a better mother.  I so cherish the opportunity to pick him up from school and be available for him.

At 5:45am I was up and working.  I'm on conference calls all morning but have a 30 minute window where I get my son up, get him dressed, turn off the Angry Birds as to finish getting him ready for his day.  When he is dropped off at school the mental checklist of the morning has been fulfilled.

Here is a run down of our conversation yesterday afternoon.

Zoom:  I'm really hungry.  I didn't eat lunch today
He is 5 and I usually find the majority of his lunch still in his lunchbox 

Dori:  Why didn't you eat lunch today?

Zoom:  You didn't pack me one

Dori:
Speechless as the guilt rushed down my spine as I realized I didn't feed him breakfast either

We all make mistakes but there are those mistakes that make you really think about your priorities.  Am I achieving the goal I set out to do?  Am I giving him enough attention to make it worth the financial sacrifice? Why do I let others control my stress level and the ability to do my jobs?  Has this ever happened to you?  I know I'm not alone and know that there are many things I'm not doing.  But its the innocent reminders that keep our pride from letting us think we're doing it all.  Because as woman, we never feel that we can.  It's the paradox of this crazy world we live in.

Needless to say.  I packed a lunch for him today.